Jewellery

Another fun part of the process. I've never been the type of girl who is big on accessories, and its not that I have anything against accessories, but i'm broke and that shit is expensive. That is why teaching back home has been so great because I could steal some of my moms stuff, who is like the accessory queen.

Regardless of whether you love jewellery or not, I've found that with the wedding it has brought out the little lost girl who loves sparkle deep inside of myself. So I've had a lot of fun shopping for my jewellery and in the process I've picked up a few good tips that I am now going to share.

The one enormous and most important piece of advice that I have for Brides is for the love of god do NOT buy your jewellery from a wedding dress shop, this includes any hairpieces too. Holy mark-up batman. Seriously you wont find one piece of jewellery for less than $150. I shopped around a bit at the beginning looking at different jewellery stores (also overpriced) and then someone suggested I check out Etsy.

(Cue birds singing, sun shining, rainbows and lollipops here) Etsy is heaven on earth. I LOVE ETSY. For those of you who dont know what it is. Essentially it is like an online marketplace for very small businesses. So these businesses set up a shop on the website and you can find them by searching for a product or by searching for the shop. Most of the stuff is handmade, there is a butt load of vintage stuff as well. You can buy multiple things from different shops or you can do like I did and buy multiple things from the same shop and save on shipping.

I found this great shop called DivineJewel that solely does wedding jewellery, and mostly with a vintage feel which will work well with my dress. The best part of Etsy is the price. Everything that I have found has been reasonably priced. I got my bracelet, necklace and bracelet, plus a gorgeous hair piece all for 190 dollars including tax and shipping. BAM DEAL. The hair pieces alone at Winchesters were around 200 dollars. And I wanted a hairpiece because for the ceremony I have a cathedral veil, but obviously I'm not wearing that to the reception so i like the hairpiece to spice up my hair for the reception.

Here are the items I got:

 hairpiece

 necklace

 earrings

 bracelet

Staying Organized, For The Unorganized Bride

I like the idea of being an organized individual, however, I have found that in practice, I tend to fail miserably at ACTUALLY being organized. When it comes to the wedding, I dont have a choice, but to be organized. So I've been a control freak for this wedding. Everything has a place and everything has been recorded in a number of different places.

For instance, I have a guest list on my wedding website, and I also have a detailed excel spreadsheet with all of the guests names, email and regular addresses etc. So every time I sent an invitation I would change the colour of their row on excel to blue and every time I get a RSVP back I change the colour to green.

Next I have printed out a bunch of circles to represent tables with 10 blank squares around them to represent the 10 seats at each table. I print out each guests name when I receive an rsvp and using sticky tack (because that's not PERMANENT) i'll assign them to a table. It is a lot easier to do seating plans with a visual.

Ta Da Organization!

The Tuxes are Picked!

We went into Tip Top last week after work one day and decided on the Tuxes. It was one of the easier choices we've made throughout this whole process and here is how it all went down: 

Before we went to Tip Top I looked through a Freeman's Formal Catalogue, which if you go through Tip Top, Rofies and a bunch of other menswear places with the exception of Moores who orders from the US, this is the company you will will be renting your tuxes from. Now there are some pros and cons to this, the pros are that they have a lot of options because they are the largest and only formal rental place in Canada, the cons is that you cant try on tuxes in the stores because they dont bring them in from Freeman's because it would cause chaos during the prom season etc. So you are ordering from a catalogue. I didn't mind this because Josh has stood in a bazillion weddings and has never had a huge problem that couldnt be fixed with the tuxes. Like one time the sizes were a bit off but they were able to handle that. 

Our biggest issue with choosing the tuxes was in order to match the groomsmen with the bridesmaids we would have to find a very particular colour purple which I hadn't seen in the catalogues and I didn't want them to wear non matching purples. I also have a things with the male side of the bridal party where I dont like the Groom to wear the exact same thing as the groomsmen because I dont like having to guess which man is the groom in pictures. So I wanted Josh to be wearing a Black Tux, with a black vest and Black Tie with a white shirt and pocket square. HATE BLACK TUXES WITH BLACK SHIRTS, makes the boys look like they are mobsters. So I wanted the boys to wear Black Tuxes with Black Vests and some variation of purple tie and pocket square. I ended up going with a polka dotted purple tie, sounds tacky but it isnt. It has a number of shades of purple so it will easily pick up the purple shade from the girls dresses. 

Here are two important things I learned from this experience: 

1. Choose them early because men can be slackers when it comes to getting sized. I know this because I always had to light a fire under Josh's ass to go get measured for his two best friends' weddings. Also if the boys put in their measurements before like 3 and half months before the wedding they get thirty dollars off their rental. Also there is a plus to having a large bridal party. If you order five groomsman tuxes the Grooms is free. AWESOMENESS.

2. Not all of your men have to wear the same tux. This sounds weird but when I was looking at the prices and stuff I wanted the older guys to get nice two button tuxes that were the most expensive ones but were still around 150 bucks which is pretty standard for formal rentals. However, I thought that was a bit much for the two ring bearers who are 4 and 8 years old. So they had a one button tux which would work fine for them for 89 dollars that I could get the same tie and stuff for as the bigger guys. 

Here are the tuxes

 groomsmen

 Josh

Ceremony Music

This is yet another post about how important it is to call in all of your favors for your big day. Little costs add up quickly and being able to get those little costs for free can help a great deal!

One of the ways I'm cutting costs and also making my ceremony more unique is by calling in a huge favor for the ceremony music. For those of you who dont know, my dad plays in a band, he can play the guitar better than most people in the world in my opinion and his band who have been together in some form or another for around 10 years have become like my crazy fake uncles whom I love to death. Over the years some of the members of the band have included my own family members, my uncle Louis was in the band for a bunch of years and now my brother Joe is in the band. So when it came to ceremony music it made no sense for us to go out and hire people we dont know to do it, when it would be so special to us to have people we love doing it. So we decided to ask Joe (one of the million favors he is doing for us this day) and Derek, who is basically family now and has been the lead singer of the band for a number of years to do the ceremony music.

So for the songs we wanted to choose timeless songs that obviously we like but that also are kind of related to the events. Most people might be in shock that I dont want to walk down the aisle to the Bridal March or to Canon in D, but to be honest, I feel like the Calvary should be coming down the aisle not the bride to some of those songs. At the same time, I can understand why brides want to go down the aisle to those songs because they are grand songs and make you feel like a star, so I get it, but they wouldn't be a reflection of me or what I want this wedding to be, which is: Romantic, Intimate (as intimate as you can get with 200 people that is), Simple, Elegant.

So here is what we are working with now: The bridal party will come down to In My Life by the Beatles (you'll notice a pattern here). I think this is just a very appropriate song for the people who mean so much to you to walk down the aisle to especially if you look at the lyrics. Then ta da me and dad and going to walk down to Something by the Beatles (note the pattern). I honestly just love this song, I love the way it makes me feel and I love everything about it. Its a good speed for a walk down the aisle song as well.

During the signing of stuff, dad is going to join in with the boys and the three or however many of them will be doing a version of Hallelujah. They do this as a band and it is literally breathtaking how beautiful their rendition is so I'm very excited for this.

And then lastly for when we are officially married and walking back down the aisle we are coming back down to Here Comes the Sun by the Beatles. No I did not plan for three out of the four songs to be by the Beatles it just so happens that they all worked so much better than our other ideas. Here Comes The Sun is a song that is filled with so much joy so I think it is beyond appropriate for that matter.

There she be!

Dont Trust The Schedules

When you first become engaged, most brides look for guidance in a schedule to follow for the planning process because there are so many things that we just dont think about. While I think these schedules are useful, they are also at times unrealistic. I've seen a lot of my girlfriends posting planning schedules on websites like Pinterest and there are times when I look at them and am like "are these people frikin crazy?" and I mean the websites, not the people posting because they dont know any better. So I decided to take a sample schedule from the Knot, which is probably the most popular one i've found and show you some good things and bad things about it!  This is all working off a one year planning schedule. I stand by my belief that if you choose to go with less than a year of planning you are crazy.

All of my comments will be in this lovely purple colour!

12+ months before

Date: ______________________

• Envision your wedding and draw up a budget. (This is important, knowing your budget from the very get go will help you plan out everything. Use a wedding budgeting tool, you can find them online everywhere, because there will be things that you will need to pay for that you would have never thought about.)
• Assemble your "planning team." Consider hiring a wedding consultant. (I dont have a consultant but I'm going to trust that this is the right time to do this)
• Pick a wedding date and time. Select several options, then check with your venues, officiant, and important guests before finalizing. (Dont wait any longer for this. When I called to book my venues it was a year and a half in advance and they were already booked for the original weekend that we had planned to get married. Places book up super fast, especially in touristy places and small towns)
• Start planning the guest list. (This is a good time to start this because the list that you start a year in advance will change a lot leading up to when you finally send out your invitations)
• Ask friends and relatives to be in the wedding party. (I did this around this early, but if you are uncomfortable with choosing people this early then I would say put it off to no longer than six or seven months before the wedding)
• Optional: Have an engagement party. You may want to register beforehand for gifts. (We did this a year in advance and it was really helpful for our budget, we bought both our wedding bands, paid a chunk on our photographer and paid a few other little things with money we made from our Jack and Jill which made this part of the planning a lot easier on us financially.)

8-10 months before

Date: ______________________

• Bride: Think about, shop for, and order your gown. (Unless your weight fluctuates an insane amount, order your dress early. It took 4 months for my dress to come in so bank on a wait.)
• Envision reception food. (We didn't have to do this until now which is less than 5 months from the day so it may depend on where the reception is)
• Decide what type of entertainment you want. A pianist for the cocktail hour, strolling violinists, a DJ, or band? (Luckily we have a friend DJing for us but if you are hiring someone, book early especially in rural locations)
• Think about your floral decor. (We aren't having any real flowers so this wasn't of relevance for us)
• Research and book your wedding professionals. Interview vendors: photographer, videographer, reception band or DJ, florist. (Firm believer this should be done a year in advance. Basically once you get engaged and set a date start booking these people fast. We weren't able to get a videographer because I waited until 8-10 months before the wedding to start looking and they were all booked for our date)
• Research a wedding insurance policy to protect your deposits. (unnecessary)
• Research and reserve accommodations for out-of-town guests.(This is more of just a curtesy to do early. A lot of my guests from Bridgewater wanted to book their rooms early and have it out of the way so we booked off blocks of rooms around 7 months before the wedding)
• Register for gifts. (We are still doing this with less than five months to go and I hate doing it. I'd rather just get money than one of the over priced gifts I registered for)
• Contact rental companies if you need to rent anything for ceremony/reception, such as chairs, tables, and tent. (Another area that books up early so as soon as you know your venue and date, book this.)

6-8 months before

Date: ______________________

• Book ceremony musicians. (Can be hard to come by in rural locations)
• Order bridesmaid dresses. (UBER IMPORTANT because again they take around 4 months to come in. I would also add start searching for these dresses in the 8-10 month range because it can be a daunting task that will take a long time)
• Start planning honeymoon.
• Send save-the-date cards. This is a particularly good idea if you're marrying during a tourist or holiday season or having a destination wedding.  (We sent these out 8 or 9 months before the date so close but a little earlier than this suggests)

4-6 months before

Date: ______________________

• Attend prewedding counseling, if required.(We got out of having to do this but typically if you get married in the Catholic Church you have to do this so make sure that you get it out of the way before things get crazy with planning)
• Shop for and order invitations and wedding rings. (I would also suggest sending out your invitations four months in advance. Because  you want to get them back a month early to let your hall know the numbers.)
• Shop for formalwear. (Next on my to do list)
• Renew or get passports, if necessary.
• Envision your wedding cake and research, interview, and book a cake designer. (I'm making my own cake so this is irrelevant to me)

3 months before

Date: ______________________

• Order wedding cake.
• Hire a calligrapher, if you want your invitations professionally addressed. (I didn't do this) 
• Attend your shower. (It may be earlier, depending on when hosts decide to have it.) (Mine is August 4th which is really only two months before the wedding
• Groom: Rent the men's formalwear. (At tip top they need AT LEAST 90 days for your order but they prefer four months
• Hire wedding-day transport: limousines, other cars. Look into transportation sooner if you're considering renting streetcars or over-the-top travel. 

2 months before

Date: ______________________

• Mail your invitations. (Way too late, you'll be lucky if Canada Post can even get all of you invitations to where they need to go in a month and then you need to get them back)
• Write your vows. (We aren't doing this but I feel like this is a personal discretion item)
• Purchase gifts for parents, attendants, and each other. (I would suggest doing this earlier because it can be stressful to have that added cost this close to the wedding)
• Book your stylist and try out big-day hairstyles. ( I would not have a hair and makeup appt if I waited this long to get it. I barely got one when I booked it 8 months in advance SO DO NOT TRUST THIS!)
• Book a makeup artist and go for a trial run. (Same as above)

1 month before

Date: ______________________

• Apply for a marriage license. Check with the local bureau in the town where you'll wed.(You can do this up to 90 days in advance of the wedding)
• Bride: Have final gown fitting. Bring your maid of honor along to learn how to bustle your dress. Have the dress pressed and bring it home. (Mine also needs to learn how to tie up the corset on my dress, not as easy as you might think)
• Call all bridesmaids. Make sure they have their gowns ready for the wedding.
• Make last-minute adjustments with vendors.
• Create a wedding program to hand out to guests.
• Order and plan in-room welcome baskets for out-of-town guests. (I am so not that considerate)

2 weeks before

Date: ______________________

• Review final RSVP list and call any guests who have not yet sent a response. (We will need to do this a month in advance because that is when the hall needs our info)
• Deliver must-have shot lists to photographer and videographer. Include who should be in formal portraits and determine when portraits will be taken.
• Deliver final song list to your DJ or bandleader. Include special song requests and songs you don't want played.
• Bride: Get your last prewedding haircut and color. (I am so very hesitant to do this)

1 week before

Date: ______________________

• Give reception site/caterer final guest head count. Include vendors, such as the photographer or band members, who will expect a meal. Ask how many extra plates the caterer will prepare.(We have to do this a month in advance)
• Supply location manager with a list of vendor requests such as a table for DJ or setup space needed by florist.
• Plan reception seating chart. 
• Print place and table cards, or finalize list with the calligrapher you have hired to do so.
• Call all wedding vendors and confirm arrangements.
• Give ceremony and reception site managers a schedule of vendor delivery and setup times, plus contact numbers.
• Groom: Get your hair trimmed.
• Attend bachelor/ette parties. (My bachelorette party is a month before the big day)

2-3 days before

Date: ______________________

• Bride: If you need to, have your gown pressed or steamed.
• Groom: Go for final fitting and pick up your formalwear. 
• Groom: Ask the best man to make sure all groomsmen attend fittings and pick up their outfits.
• Determine wedding-party positions during ceremony and the order of the party in the processional and recessional.
• Hand off place cards, table cards, menus, disposable cameras, favors, and any other items for setting the tables to the caterer and/or reception site manager.
• Reconfirm final details with all vendors. Discuss any necessary last-minute substitutions.
• Call the limousine- or car-rental company for pickup times and locations.
• Arrange for guests without cars to be picked up from the airport or train station. Ask friends, attendants, or relatives to help.
• Deliver welcome baskets to the hotel concierge; make sure to include names and delivery instructions.

Day before

Date: ______________________

• Provide all wedding professionals with an emergency phone number to call on the day of the wedding.
• Write checks and/or talk to wedding hosts (usually your parents, if not you) about any final balances to be paid at the end of the reception.

Night before

Date: ______________________

• Rehearse ceremony. Meet with wedding party, ceremony readers, immediate family, and your officiant at the ceremony site to rehearse and iron out details.
• Bring unity candle, aisle runner, yarmulkes, or other ceremony accessories to the site. 
• Give your marriage license to your officiant.
• Attend rehearsal dinner.
• Present attendants with gifts at the rehearsal dinner. You'll want to do this especially if the gifts are accessories to be worn during the wedding.

Day of

Date: ______________________

• Present parents and each other with gifts.
• Give wedding bands to the best man and the maid of honor to hold during the ceremony.
• Give best man the officiant's fee envelope, to be handed off after the ceremony.
• Introduce your reception site manager to your consultant or maid of honor for questions or problems during the reception.
• Assign a family member or attendant to be the photographer's contact so he knows who is who.

Postwedding

Date: ______________________

• Prearrange for someone to return any rentals.
• Preplan for attendants to take the bride's gown for cleaning and return the groom's tux to the rental shop.
• Write and send thank-you notes to gift-bearing guests and vendors who were especially helpful.

The Ride

For some reason I didn't think this would be as challenging as it has been. When it comes to finding transportation for the day, I've hit a few road blocks. The first is the obvious one: I dont have a lot of money to spend on transportation on the day. Its not a huge priority for me, but at the same time I dont really want to roll up to the church in my 2007 mazda3, IF I'M BEING HONEST!!!!!

We looked into the limo option and it sucked. There are no limos on Cape Breton Island that can fit our entire, which, to be fair, is quite large. Apart from that to rent a limo for like four hours is $600 and that is ridiculous in my opinion. Then I looked into like specialty limos, they dont exist in Cape Breton apparently.

My next thought was too look into antique car rentals, which are next to impossible to find in rural areas. So then I had to put my thinking cap on. I wanted something that looked sharp but wouldn't cost me an arm and a leg.

Finally the idea came to me to look on rental car websites. I found premium car rentals (I would have preferred a premium SUV, but they dont carry them in small cities) on AVIS and Enterprise for a decent price. So I think what we are going to go with now is a premium car, which will likely be a Black or Silver Chrysler 300 and it will be about 150 bucks for the two days, which isn't bad considering the alternatives.

The Summer Of No Fun

Now before I begin, I dont want to give you the impression that Josh and I live a grand life any other year, by any means. We can usually afford to go to the movies once or twice a month and if someone is going away we'll splurge on a night downtown. But other than groceries, gas and bills we dont spend a lot of money on ourselves. This summer we will be even more boring then ever before. We still have to save about two grand to pay off the rest of the stuff that we need to pay off before the big day! This includes but is not limited to, the last 500 bucks for the photography, the wine on the tables, the flowers for in the centrepieces, the transportation and lodging expenses and the list goes on.

So if you ask us to go out for a beer or dinner or anything this summer, the answer will likely be a hard lined no. This is not because we dont love you, this is because we will be living like hermits for the summer.